As a devotional alchemist committed to helping others feel safe but also fully alive, tapped in and turned on in their being, I often find myself reflecting on how the simplest of "practices" have such immense impact. This being one of them.
On this particular evening, I was about 8 days out from my period. I was feeling drained, disjointed, mentally exhausted and small. Yes, small.
I had just completed a month-long journey of ending a lot of old habits and behaviors that in the past kept me safe, but by no means thriving - and the front of my body, with each "goodbye", slowly collapsed forward as a means to protect my most precious commodities.
My throat My heart. And my womb.
I remembered feeling so much anxiety as I laid back over the wheel, in full surrender, exposing it all. In typical behavior, my womb held herself in place like a stubborn child, forcing my belly to constrict and my breath to stay shallow. Dead.
She was fucking scared. She had already put herself out there on multiple occasions, surrendering to the Divine in more ways than she felt comfortable. She had birthed so much. In such a small amount of time. She overcame so much doubt, fear, and feelings of unworthiness.
"I just want to be safe."
And then my breath, without any conscious "doing", expanded. It gradually ballooned out into the depths of my root and as I exhaled, she lifted ever so slightly. With each pass, she opened more and more to the pleasure that had always resided there. And with time, the Enchantress returned.
☽
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